By Lauren Anthony
Sharing secrets and keeping them has become a norm. It gives us a chance to confine in someone close and know that they will protect what we have shared. Even media shares the use of keeping secrets such as the catchy theme song from Pretty Little Liars to letting go of all the secrets one holds with One Republic’s song Secrets.
Women seem to be notoriously known for gossiping and their inability to keep secrets, especially from husbands. It is also stated that they cannot keep secrets long and that is not good. Everyone keeps secrets, but the focus tends to be primarily on women. Focusing on that aspect, I will be sharing the damage of keeping secrets, how others in society view women keeping secrets, but also some outlets where everyone is allowed to share their secrets in a safe place.
One way to share secrets and still have privacy is through Postsecret. Frank Warren created postsecret and it has now exploded worldwide, you can buy books, go onto the website and other places to view the secrets. A now more current form of sharing secrets is through the app, Yik Yak that is used by college students and others. Keeping secrets or using online sources to share them may look all fine and well, but in reality it is incredibly damaging leading to issues such as depression and anxiety.
According to an article from Women’s Health it is said that 95% of women withhold secrets from their loved ones and lied to someone close to them. Keeping secrets can cause a variety of feelings ranging from anxiety to depression. The weight of the secret can be extremely tiring on those who are keeping it and do not know how to handle it. You can read more about the effects of keeping secrets here.
Murray Wardrop said in his article that four out of ten women in the study of 3,000 women could not keep a secret. It was broken down into sharing the secret with a friend, sharing it with someone not even involved, urges to reveal the secret, gossiping, feeling guilty after sharing the secret, or forgetting it once it is told to them. Donald Trump who is currently running in the Republican primaries has shared that women in politics cannot be trusted to keep secrets from their husbands.
Now a days it is much easier to share secrets. The Secret Illness is a website that shares posts from the point of view of people with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. This site gives a brand new look into the world of those who suffer with OCD and how it so much more than what people assume.
College students are also affected by mental illness as they come into their own and begin to form a career path. The College Mental Health Services Fund is a bill that if passed would provide more counselors on campuses and more outlets for students to go to and talk about their mental health. Keeping secrets does not have to be a burden to anyone; there are safe places to share.
Regardless of studies being made or people like Trump making comments, the fact is that secrets will always exist. Instead of blaming women for spreading secrets, we should find ways to avoid this and help keep secrets from becoming damaging. Whether it is through the use of posting on Yik Yak, The Secret Illness, or just talking to the person who shared the secret.
Keeping secrets is not all bad and sometimes keeping them is important for us. It may be a very personal secret or something that we would rather share at a later time.
The takeaway message for all readers is that secrets are something that we all have. Sometimes it may feel right and other times it may be telling someone to relieve some unwanted feelings. The best advice I can give is to do what makes you feel good and not what others expect.
If you are interested more about Postsecret you can check out Postsecret—The Secret Lives of Men and Women on Youtube.