Welcome to Sex Talk with Nick, your weekly dose of pleasure. I’m here to give you an educational insight into the world of sex. This week, we are going to discuss fetishes, and how they can vary from person to person.
Sexual fetishism, or erotic fetishism, is sexual arousal a person receives from a physical object, or from a specific situation. The object or situation of interest is called the fetish. A sexual fetish may be regarded as an enhancing element to a romantic or sexual relationship.
“I love being controlled,” said Skyler, gay, 22, sexually active. “Every time my boyfriend throws me up against the wall or handcuffs me to the bed, I get extremely turned on by it.”
Many people like different things when it comes to pleasure, and how they use them is also different in each situation. Fetishists can be any gender, and range widely in age.
Where do fetishes come from? According to Barnaby Barratt, Ph.D., a sex therapist and president-elect of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists, “It’s a complicated answer, to be addressed on an individual basis.”
“I’m quite embarrassed to say this, but I like to be peed on,” said Sarah, straight, 23, sexually active. “For the longest time that has been one of my fetishes, and I’m not sure why I like it…I just do.”
Fetishes vary from person to person. They can be light and kinky, to extreme and freaky. Understanding that each person likes something different is important.
“I love small breasts,” said James, straight, 28, sexually active. “I don’t know if it’s really considered a fetish, but I have always enjoyed small breasted woman over the larger.”
There are so many fetishes that there is no way to list them all here, but here are a few that you might be interested in:
This is actually one of the more common fetishes out there. Also known as anililagnia, this means that the fetishist has an attraction for older women.
Watching Others Have Sex
Also know as voyeurism, this revolves around a person getting aroused from looking at naked bodies or other people having sex. This could entail going to strip clubs or watching your friends have sex with each other.
People who enjoy this could like whipping, choking, or harsh biting. This fetish is also known as BDSM (bondage/dominance/sadomasochism), which involves inflicting pain on one or both partners for sexual pleasure.
Humans are very visual creatures. Pictophilia, or an affinity for pornography, is a common fetish involving a fascination with pornographic pictures.
Known as podophilia, this is a sexual interest in feet. This can vary from foot treatments, or the appearance of toes and feet, to odor and tactile interaction, such as licking or smelling feet. While this might not be your preference, it is quite common among many people.
Some people have many fetishes and enjoy exploring them with others. Others say that they don’t have any.
“I have never really had a fetish before,” said Curtis, straight, 25, sexually active. “I have always been into what I feel is the “normal sex,” which for me is just intercourse with my girlfriend. I don’t need anything else except her to get me in the mood.”
So, as you can see, sex can be so many things. We are all human beings, we are equal (or should be), and we all have ways of finding and acting on certain pleasures. There is no right and no wrong to sex, just a diverse pool of pleasures. The more open-minded we are to sex, the more we are going to learn about it throughout the rest of our lives, but remember–safety first.
Happy Pleasuring! ❤