Sex Talk With Nick: Sexual Diversity

Nick Dimico

Welcome to “Sex Talk with Nick,” your weekly dose of pleasure. I’m here to give you an educational insight into the world of sex. This week we are going to discuss Sexual Diversity, and how sex is such a natural part of living.

Sex is a giant aspect of how we live our lives. Some feel pleasure, while others feel pain. Some like sex as a way of releasing toxins, while others like it because they are in love with the other person. Humans and different species have sex for many different reasons.

Sexual Diversity means that everyone has different understandings about what sex means to them.

Sexuality also plays a part in sexual diversity, as it can mean that you are attracted to someone of the opposite gender (straight), the same gender (gay or lesbian) or both genders (bisexual) and so on….there is no wrong, right, or ‘normal’ sexuality.

Recently, I asked myself the questions, “Why? Why do people have sex? Why do people have one-night stands? Why and how do people love or fall in love?” I couldn’t figure it out, so I did a study.

First, I created a survey of 32 questions, ranging from light and non-personal to extremely personal. I asked my friends on Facebook if they would be willing to take the survey. I asked for men, women, gays, virgins, those who are sexually active, straight couples, bisexuals, lesbians, transsexuals, sex addicts, people with fetishes, and those who hate sex.

Instantly, I had a grand total of 45 people who said “yes” to participate in the survey.

After the interview, I did a follow-up question asking how they felt during the interview, whether they were excited, embarrassed, happy, weird, or even turned on, and if they would encourage others to participate in the interview.

Many felt very comfortable, and most would encourage others to participate in the sex interview. About 15 of the participants stated that they were turned on during the interview, so much that they felt like going at that very second to masturbate or have sex with their partner. They felt it was a natural turn-on to talk and answer questions about sex.

Diversity plays a huge part in sex.

“Sex to me can be many things,” said Rachel, 34, other (with bisexual tendencies), sexually active. “Sex for me ranges from physical release to a deep spiritual connection that catalyzes a cellular connection with the universe. Sex is f***ing hard, sex is control, sex is making slow sweet love, sex is submission, sex is war, sex is peace, sex is connection with the human experience, sex is revenge, sex is art, sex is vocal, sex is sacred, sex is pleasure and sex is pain.”

To Stephen, sex means something different, yet personal to his wants, needs, and pleasures.

“Sex to me is fun,” said Stephen, 23, straight, sexually active. “Sex is also emotional, or a pleasurable experience that can be enjoyed casually and with a long-term partner.”

We each have different ways of being pleased or pleasing ourselves. Some like to be thrown up against a wall and penetrated with the passion of their partner, while others like to have slow sex. Some believe in having sex with only one person, while many people like to have many partners, open relationships, threesomes, or orgies. Some have sex as a way to build a family, while some have sex as a way of making money either through prostitution or porn.

Not only do we have preferences when having sex with others, but we also have preferences of how we please ourselves while alone.

“I do masturbate,” said Erin, 26, straight, sexually active. “There aren’t always men, so I do it about 2-3 times a week, depending on if I need it or not.”

Some women and men have different feelings when it comes to masturbating.

“I masturbate once a day,” said Colt, 22, straight, sexually active.

Colt may “chuck the chicken” once a day, but when it comes to Jesse, he states that it’s an annual thing.

“No…I masturbate 3 times a year tops,” said Jesse, 21 straight, sexually active. “I find it to be awkward.”

When I heard this, I was kind of dumbfounded. I thought about it for a while and kept wondering why it would be awkward. I do it maybe one to two times a day, and I find it to be pleasurable. I then thought, “Am I weird?”

The answer is no, I am just different. I’m different from you, and different from all others. We each have different feelings about what we do sexually, and that is what makes life so amazing.

Sex continues to differ in each part of our lives. When people have intercourse, each person has a certain position that they like to be pleased in. Positions can range from the seated wheelbarrow to doggy style.

Members of the LGBTQ+ community may use the many of the same positions, but they also use others that sometimes aren’t used in the straight community.

Sex in the gay community is just like sex in the straight community. What makes it different is not the fact that it’s two men or two women or those who have other preferences, but it’s how they choose to be pleasured. With gay men, they have a certain preference such as top, bottom, or versatile.

As you can see, sex can be so many things. It ranges from different types of pleasures and positions, to the way we act on it, depending on maturity level or experience. We are all human beings, we are equal (or should be), and we all have ways of finding and acting on certain pleasures. There is no right and no wrong to sex, just a diversity pool of pleasures! The more open-minded we are to sex, the more we are going to learn about it throughout the rest of our lives. Just remember, safety first.

Happy Pleasuring! ❤

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